Our Adoption Story
Our adoption story probably starts just like anyone else, with lots of paperwork and very little patience. Mark and I have three bio children together and had a desire to add to our family. Being unable to have anymore biological children, we sat down and had a family counsel with our children to see if adoption was something they were interested in. Our oldest son was 10 and our two daughters were 8 and 6. They were equally excited for this adventure.
In July 2000, we made the big step and started the paperwork. Our children obtained a paper route and started saving money to help with the process. We cut down on some of the family activities and mom went back to work to finance our choice. Our children were in the decision making process from the beginning and felt very connected to this experience. After lots of frustrating trips to the Lt. Governor's office for apostilling and many other paperwork headaches, we finally received word that we were to travel.
We were leaving right before Thanksgiving of 2001, two months after 9/11. Needless to say I was worried about leaving our kids and going to a foreign country half way around the world, my husband thought I was silly. With a great big breath and a big sigh we stepped on the airplane for our first trip to Russia. After a long flight we finally arrived in Vladivostok. It was our hope and desire to adopt two children; we had INS approval for two. We wanted a little girl and boy to round out our family. Lots of people wanted to know why we were going to adopt two children. We decided if we ever wanted more, now was the time and we should get two, because funds would always be short.
Our first trip to the orphanage was certainly
eye opening when I first held our little girl. She was but a feather in weight.
Kaylee weighed 14 pounds and was 18 months old. She did not have the strength
in her legs to stand, and could barely sit without falling over. Her eyes were
very flat and expressionless. We had a doctor on standby, back in the states to
review any digital photos and health history. This doctor after looking at Kaylee
said that there was hope and she didn't see much that couldn't be fixed. We still
spent a lot of time thinking and praying about if she was to come to our home.
We agreed that Kaylee needed to come home with us. The next several days we spent
trying to find a little boy which would fit into our home. Having medical background
I was probably more cautious and conservative than most people.
During
the week we were unable to find a little boy. We went home a little saddened yet
grateful we had found our little Kaylee. We returned home a day or two before
Thanksgiving, which will be a Thanksgiving I will never forget. We look at things
we have in this country with new hope, ideals and gratitude for we are truly blessed.
Word came that we were to be leaving for Russia 10 days before Christmas; unfortunately we would be unable to have Christmas with our kids. We were in court on Christmas day and picked up our Christmas present right after court. (Santa must have over shot our house and she was a COD delivery).
While we were in Russia the second time our agency said there was one little boy we should go look at, he had a heart defect in his medical history yet we should take a peak at him. My husband was against looking for any more children, as it would mean one more trip to Russia and two more weeks away from work without any money left. I mentioned we needed to at least go, because if we didn't we would always wonder. The trip to the orphanage in Ussyrisk was a two hour trip and during the entire trip Mark was saying we're not coming back, we can't afford it.
We were sitting in the visitation room when Alex walked in; he was wearing a pair of blue jeans, a red button down shirt and a black bow tie. He came up to us and especially went up to Mark and gave him the biggest smile, which lit up his whole face. From that point on, we knew we were coming back. Alex's smile can be seen from all directions, even when you are standing behind him his little ears twitch when he smiles. We were certainly concerned with Alex's heart condition, and we spent a lot of time with the orphanage's doctor. We paid money to have Alex seen by a doctor in Russia, so that his x-rays could be sent to our doctor in the states. After several phone conversations, we knew that he was coming home, probably for open heart surgery, but with hopes of a full recovery. Before we made the final decision, we sent pictures back to our children and asked them if they would be willing to help us bring Alex home, the decision was unanimous. We were coming back to Russia for a third trip.
Through the help of A Child Waits Foundation, we were able to find the financial resources to make the additional trip. On New Year's Eve, we said goodbye to our little Alex, but to return soon. It was a difficult thing to do, but we took our sweet little princess home. We returned home on New Years with Kaylee, and were not able to go back until April due to my husband's job and the time which we needed to take off work. Kaylee needed the extra time to try to catch up on her development. She was much like an infant; we had to teach her how to sit up and crawl and how to eat. Many times we would come in and catch her drinking from the dog's dish.
In April we returned yet again to Russia
to pick up Alex, the people we worked with were wonderful and a joy to work with.
They helped make Alex's court hearings go well. We were able to only stay in Russia
for a little over a week. The week after we returned home, we took Alex to his
appointment with the cardiologist. The news was good. The doctor viewed Alex as
a healthy little boy and did not want to do any heart surgery yet. We continue
to go to an annual check up and monitor his health.
Our three trips to Russia and six weeks there was an experience we will never forget. The people we dealt with were very kind. We have a new appreciation for the things we have. We learned to find humor in our situation. One of the most humorous things we had happen was when we were in an elevator with two ladies who were Korean and spoke only Korean we were American and spoke English and the elevator stopped and became stuck. Of course we had people outside the elevator yelling at us and telling us what to do in Russian. We just stood in the elevator and laughed.
Alex
and Kaylee are a joy to our family; we grow to love them more and more each day.
Alex adores his big brother (14 yrs old) and they spend many hours together playing
legos and watching Star Wars. Kaylee has everybody wrapped around her finger.
Alex and Kaylee are six months apart and go to an early intervention preschool.
It has been at times a hard transition, yet it has been rewarding, as we watch
them grow and change each day. It took Kaylee a year to learn to find joy in things
and to actually laugh out loud. They enjoy playing with each other. Alex loves
Spiderman and Kaylee loves Dora and dancing. These children are truly as Americanized
as one who was born in this country. We are definitely grateful we took the two
trips to visit Alex. We are grateful for that smile that changed our life and
his.
We
hope you enjoy the photos of the kids and our family.
Sincerely,
Mark and Lynda Middlebrook
